( 真人真事）不要惹火老人。

[alexhuang1961]

(真人真事）不要惹火老人。
(True Story) Don't mess with old people.

George Phillips, an elderly man, from Walled Lake, Michigan, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.
喬治·菲力浦斯是一個住在寨湖--密西根州的老人，正要就寢的時候，他太太告訴他，她從臥室的窗戶看過去，當他離開花園的小屋時忘了關燈。喬治開了後門要去關燈，卻看見幾個人正在小屋裡偷東西。

He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?"
他打電話給員警，員警問道：“有人進到你屋子裡面了嗎？”

He said "No, but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me."
他說：“沒有，但那些人正闖入我花園的小屋裡偷東西。”

Then the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available"
然後這名員警調度員說：“目前所有巡邏人員都很忙，你應該鎖好你的門，一旦有警員可以調度時就會過去。”

George said, "Okay."
喬治說，“好吧。”

He hung up the phone and counted to 30. Then he phoned the police again.
他掛了電話，然後數到30。接著，再打電話給員警。

"Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I just shot and killed them both, the dogs are eating them right now." and he hung up.
“你好，我就是剛才打電話過去，說有人闖進我小屋偷東西的那個人。現在，你不用擔心了，因為我已經開槍把他們給幹掉了，幾隻狗正在吃著他們呢。“講完他就把電話給掛了。

Within five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, two Fire Trucks, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence, and caught the burglars red-handed.
不到五分鐘，6輛警車、特警隊、一架直升機、兩輛消防車、一個醫務人員、和一輛救護車出現在菲力浦斯的住所，並將竊賊人贓俱獲。

One of the Policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!"
一名員警對喬治說：“我以為你真的開槍射殺了他們！”

George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"
喬治說，“我以為你們真的沒有一個人調度得過來！”

[min]

真有幽默感!

[cwhung]

鬼島的警察
開罰單, 拖吊車的時候, 手腳都很快
辦刑案的時候, 不但動作慢
還要先鳴警笛, 通知歹徒快閃

[vsdog]

鬼島的警察
開罰單, 拖吊車的時候, 手腳都很快
辦刑案的時候, 不但動作慢
還要先鳴警笛, 通知歹徒快閃

會嗎
上次有車擋住我家車庫(出入口是紅線區不可臨停)
找警察來
聯絡拖吊車
與警察一起在寒風中等待一小時
拖吊車才姍姍來遲
神秘的車主突然出現
在被拖吊前及時把車開走

[lingokon]

[oldman]

偶是不謊報騙警察的

偶都直接用槍

[diligent]

佩服!!佩服!!
薑還是老的辣