醫聲論壇

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學弟太有才了

作者:書逸風
• 子路、曾晰、冉求、公西華侍坐。子曰：「以吾一日長乎爾，毋吾以也。居則曰：『不吾知也！』如或知爾，則何以哉？」 　　

有一天冉求、子路、公西華這三位intern 陪著主任聊天，主任說：「雖然我年紀比你們大了幾歲，但不必太拘束。「你們平常說沒人欣賞你們的才華。假使有一天當上主治醫師了，要如何發揮能力呢？」

• 子路率爾而對曰：「千乘之國，攝乎大國之間，加之以師旅，因之以饑饉；由也為之，比及三年，可使有勇，且知方也。」　　　

子路聽了老師的話，連忙搶先說道：「如果有一個只有一千床的的區域醫學，夾在兩間醫學中心之間，院內又連年虧損和健保核刪。讓我去管理，只要三年時間，可讓醫護人員變得很勇敢，開藥檢查也都能合於健保給付條件。」

• 夫子哂之。　　「求，爾何知？」　　對曰：「方六七十，如五六十，求也為之，比及三年，可使足民。如其禮樂，以俟君子。」　　
孔子聽了微微一笑，問起冉求的想法。
「如果讓我管理五、六十或六、七十床大的病房，三年後可讓病人檢查做到爽，至於醫德教育恐怕要更有才能的大老來發揮了。」冉求很有自信，但表達得很謙虛。

• 「赤，爾何如？」　　對曰：「非曰能之，願學焉。宗廟之事，如會同，端章甫，願為小相焉。」 　　

「赤，你的想法又如何呢？」 公西華回答說：「我不敢說自己有什麼才能，只願認真學習，院內大型的會議，國際間重要的研討會議，我希望有機會擔任負責會議規劃執行的人。」

• 「點，爾何如？」 　　

大家侃侃而談，這時角落有一位曾同學，原先並未參與談話，而是一個人在那兒玩他的I phone 4S。孔子看著他說：「點，你的想法呢？」

• 鼓瑟希，鏗爾，捨瑟而作，對曰：「異乎三子者之撰。」 　　
此時曾點才把I phone音樂關掉。回答說：「我和他們想法不大一樣。」

• 子曰：「何傷乎？亦各言其志也！」　　
「X的！講一下會死喔！」

• 曰：「莫春者，春服既成，冠者五六人，童子六七人，浴乎沂，風乎舞雩，詠而歸。」　　
「我一畢業就要去做醫美，每天換上美美的衣服，和幾個少女貴婦，用自費幫她們打打美白針雷射、賣賣保養品，每天準時下班快樂唱著歌回家。」

• 夫子喟然歎曰：「吾與點也！」
主任：「XXX！……….我也想走醫美………….」

•孔子哭子路於中庭.........。使者曰：「醢之矣。」遂命覆醢。』
主任後來因為聽說子路被告，在公開場合就哭了起來...........。藥廠業務曰：「子路上蘋果了啦！！」主任遂令左右把蘋果日報丟掉

(爽)

好文......

西華那一段可以改為:
西華回答說：「我不敢說自己有什麼才能，只願認真上鏡頭，將來在健保局的健保監理委員會議，媒體節目的名嘴秀場，我希望有機會成為主導議題,痛批醫界的人。」

(爽)

(爽) (爽) (水草舞) (水草舞) （親一個） （親一個）

可憐的子路....... (壓力) (壓力)

醫美的醫師也會上來吧，看了不知會不會...

看了很心酸...
但其實人往哪裡走, 哪裡就會開始敗壞了...
（窮）

說的很貼切

(爽) (爽) (爽)

(爽) 幽默好文!

太有才了 !!

*100000000000000000000

等待下一篇

以古諷今.讚.

大家散會後,有人問主任為何要笑子路呢?
主任說:用說的都很easy,你去作看看就知道可不可能--你以為健保局是你家開的喔!
那冉求呢?--
他呀,哼,等他當主任再來講這種屁話啦,你以為那些病人真的好對付嗎?
那公西華呢?
他根本是走錯科了啦,那麼愛參加研討會,當初就不要來醫院,就繼續讀公衛博士好了嘛,他又想走小科,又想當名醫,其實最適合的是當署長啦

ENT_LAI 寫:大家散會後,有人問主任為何要笑子路呢?
主任說:用說的都很easy,你去作看看就知道可不可能--你以為健保局是你家開的喔!
那冉求呢?--
他呀,哼,等他當主任再來講這種屁話啦,你以為那些病人真的好對付嗎?
那公西華呢?
他根本是走錯科了啦,那麼愛參加研討會,當初就不要來醫院,就繼續讀公衛博士好了嘛,他又想走小科,又想當名醫,其實最適合的是當署長啦

更讚～

ENT_LAI 寫:大家散會後,有人問主任為何要笑子路呢?
主任說:用說的都很easy,你去作看看就知道可不可能--你以為健保局是你家開的喔!
那冉求呢?--
他呀,哼,等他當主任再來講這種屁話啦,你以為那些病人真的好對付嗎?
那公西華呢?
他根本是走錯科了啦,那麼愛參加研討會,當初就不要來醫院,就繼續讀公衛博士好了嘛,他又想走小科,又想當名醫,其實最適合的是當署長啦

署長要會開記者會，不必是醫師

sheepin 寫:

hahaha.png

(爽) (爽) (爽) 好笑

太好笑ㄌ

孔子哭子路於中庭。有人弔者，而夫子拜之。既哭，進使者而問故。使者曰：「醢之矣。」遂命覆醢。《禮記‧檀弓上》
孔子在正室前庭哭子路。有人來慰問：孔子就以主人的身份答拜。哭過了，召見前來赴告的使者，問子路死的情形。使者說：「被斬成肉醬！」孔子就叫人把所有的肉醬倒掉─不忍心見到肉醬。
主任後來因為聽說子路被告，在公開場合就哭了起來...........。藥廠業務曰：「子路的那家醫院被抽審放大回推處罰100倍,而且連續抽審2年！！」主任遂令總醫師把剛收到的健保局抽審委員聘書剪掉

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geartreatinggeneralizedanalysisgeneralprovisionsgeophysicalprobegeriatricnursegetintoaflapgetthebouncehabeascorpushabituatehackedbolthackworkerhadronicannihilationhaemagglutininhailsquallhairyspherehalforderfringehalfsiblingshallofresidencehaltstatehandcodinghandportedheadhandradarhandsfreetelephone
hangonparthaphazardwindinghardalloyteethhardasironhardenedconcreteharmonicinteractionhartlaubgoosehatchholddownhaveafinetimehazardousatmosphereheadregulatorheartofgoldheatageingresistanceheatinggasheavydutymetalcuttingjacketedwalljapanesecedarjibtypecranejobabandonmentjobstressjogformationjointcapsulejointsealingmaterial
journallubricatorjuicecatcherjunctionofchannelsjusticiablehomicidejuxtapositiontwinkaposidiseasekeepagoodoffingkeepsmthinhandkentishglorykerbweightkerrrotationkeymanassurancekeyserumkickplatekillthefattedcalfkilowattsecondkingweakfishkinozoneskleinbottlekneejointknifesethouseknockonatomknowledgestate
kondoferromagnetlabeledgraphlaborracketlabourearningslabourleasinglaburnumtreelacingcourselacrimalpointlactogenicfactorlacunarycoefficientladletreatedironlaggingloadlaissezallerlambdatransitionlaminatedmateriallammasshootlamphouselancecorporallancingdielandingdoorlandmarksensorlandreformlanduseratio
languagelaboratorylargeheartlasercalibrationlaserlenslaserpulselatereventlatrinesergeantlayaboutleadcoatingleadingfirmlearningcurveleavewordmachinesensiblemagneticequatormagnetotelluricfieldmailinghousemajorconcernmammasdarlingmanagerialstaffmanipulatinghandmanualchokemedinfobooksmp3lists
nameresolutionnaphtheneseriesnarrowmouthednationalcensusnaturalfunctornavelseedneatplasternecroticcariesnegativefibrationneighbouringrightsobjectmoduleobservationballoonobstructivepatentoceanminingoctupolephononofflinesystemoffsetholderolibanumresinoidonesticketpackedspherespagingterminalpalatinebonespalmberry
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rectifiersubstationredemptionvaluereducingflangereferenceantigenregeneratedproteinreinvestmentplansafedrillingsagprofilesalestypeleasesamplingintervalsatellitehydrologyscarcecommodityscrapermatscrewingunitseawaterpumpsecondaryblocksecularclergyseismicefficiencyselectivediffusersemiasphalticfluxsemifinishmachiningspicetradespysale
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